Crazy Job Postings

[#1]

Hi all,

We have closed this thread due to its size. Please feel free to continue sharing your experience with odd and curious jobs here.

We encourage you to have fun and discuss your experience. That said, please be mindful of our Community Guidelines and refrain from posting links to job postings, names of persons or companies or any other identifying information. Additionally, if you come across a job that violates Upwork TOS, please flag it as inappropriate following the steps outlined here.

[#2]

This is just one of many by the same company. Usually the price is $5,000.

$10000
**edited for Community Guidelines**

Of the dozens that I've seen, this is the first where they slip and admit to requesting free consulting work via the interview process.

[#3]

From Australia: **edited for Community Guidelines** (italics mine)

Because as we all know, cosmic entities that swirl around all of us are best sold online and imported from China.

[#4]

Now that's what I call next level R&D in Data Mining.

**edited for Community Guidelines**

<<Information needed
Data Mining
**edited for Community Guidelines**

[#5]

I once saw one in which the guy claimed his family had hired hackers to monitor all of his devices. He wanted to reverse monitor the hackers.

[#6]

Just to lighten your day. Maybe a few extra people asked to submit a proposal.

[#7]

Mods, I know that this thread isn't very active, but can you provide some refreshers on how much we may paste into here to describe the job posting and its quirks?

[#8]

Hi Jonathan,

Thank you for your message. We have edited posts in this thread that did not adhere to our Community Guidelines which specifically states, including names of persons or companies (or other identifying information) in an accusation of misconduct, incompetence, or other wrongdoing. You can always report this information directly to Upwork if you suspect an issue, but posting it in Community is not appropriate. That said, we do not allow posting a link or screenshot of the job post in the community thread. You are still allowed to discuss the job and its content without adding a link, screenshots or other content that will redirect to the exact job posting or reveal the client's identity in any way.

Thank you,

Pradeep

[#9]

Resurrecting this thread with a perfectly appropriate end-of-October job post. Client is looking for people to share their pregnancy and post-mortem skincare routines. Wellness from beyond the grave 💀

[#10]

**Edited for Community Guidelines**

"Write me a software to block off all slots in the embassy so that no one can get a visa other than by paying us to free up a slot for him"

[#11]

Someone looking for a pitch deck writer to help them convince an investor to 'invest' $250k for a 'well-known' entertainment lawyer who is absolutely on board with OP's proposed intellectual property lawsuit against Kanye West, who has, allegedly, consistently stolen their work over the past 13 years. The case is guaranteed to win with a payout of many millions, according to 'plenty of lawyers'. All that's needed is someone to convince an investor to hand over a measly $250,000.

[#12]

"If you are experienced in Word with tracking changes, Chicago Manual of Style, and CMOS, YOU are the candidate!"

So, what is CMOS?

[#13]

Ravi,

I just Googled it: complementary metal-oxide semiconductor (CMOS).
There is a Wikipedia page about it here:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CMOS

Where do I apply? 🤣

[#14]

---

Renata S wrote:

Ravi,

I just Googled it: complementary metal-oxide semiconductor (CMOS).
There is a Wikipedia page about it here:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CMOS

Where do I apply? 🤣

---

Hahaha!

BTW, the job has a budget of $45, and the client is looking for a “professional” editor.

[#15]

Babysitter Needed

Because some FLs don't pay attention to To-Do list and they didn't 'show up' it says.

The title is funny.

About weeks ago, I think I saw a job that needed someone to call the client, to read a story or something because they had difficulties in sleeping, and to wake them up in the morning. lol

and last month, there were job ads related to dating sites or something.

Well I think different people, have different needs. As to why, I suggested new filter implementation: personal, professional, personal_professional_needs

[#16]

Fixed-price - Expert - Est. Budget: $50

I have 15 (approx 30 seconds) videos...........................Green Screen, Voice over, buyout music.....blah...blah...........................

I cut out the rest of what they asked for

So you are asking for us to do each video for $3.33   - MINUS FEES, TAXES and CONNECTS ets!

REALLY! This job should be more like $10 per video.

They better go off-shore  then and fuind some fool kid to do it!

Sorry folks this sort of nonsence eirks me to no end.

[#17]

EXAMPLE #2

basically we record videos and you will edit them for me so i can post
also will need a intro and outro made as well
this will be long term as i have no time to edit
trying to make this happen soon as we are moving and thats when we are starting 🙂

You got the smiley face but......maybe tell us WHAT TYPE of video you are doing?

Or the Delivery services, or the due dates?

And you want a decent proposal????

AGAIN - INFORMATION !!!

[#18]

UW no longer attracts serious clients. Flooded with irrelevant proposals written by chatgpt, by people with no relevant skill, getting 50+ proposals in first 10 minutes after posting their job - they realize what it is all about and move away.

[#19]

Or how about clients who have posted a 3 page project looking for an expert and their budget is $3-$5 per hour...LOL No thank you!!

[#20]

with those long requirements and colourful emojis :rocket:👽:eggplant:

[#21]

This one has made my day 😂: 

"We are seeking a professional to provide pest control and staff hiring leads in Bangalore. The ideal candidate should have experience in pest control and human resources. The main responsibilities of the job include identifying potential clients, researching and generating leads, and providing recommendations for staff hiring. The successful candidate should have excellent communication skills and be able to work independently. Relevant skills for this job include:

- Pest control
- Human resources
- Lead generation
- Communication skills"

I just wonder how massive lay-offs look like in this company, executed (pun intended) by Pest Control/HR officers...☠️

[#22]

This one appeared in this thread before?

[#23]

$20 for reviewing plot outlines ranging from 750k to 1000k words.

Golly! 1000k words!

[#24]

Then there is this: edit our 30,000-page book

[#25]

Wow. That's longer than the OED.

Here's one for a TOP Urgent editing project. The client has translated a technical document from Dutch to English using AI/machine translation. According to the client, "English audiences are saying that English translation is pretty bad" and wants to hire an editor to perfect the machine-translated English.

I hope they don't work for a bomb-disposal unit. If so, they might find themselves in line for a Darwin Award.

[#26]

"I hope they don't work for a bomb-disposal unit. If so, they might find themselves in line for a Darwin Award."

Haha!