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astepanov83
Community Member

How to cope with anger and not to ** anyone

I live in a block of flats. Some time ago I noticed someone smokes at the staircase. It's kind of prohibited, but we rarely use the staircase and the smoke and the smell quickly dissipates, so it does not trouble me. The real problem is that these morons litter. They throw cigarette butts and used matches on the floor, they leave empty bottles of **bleep** they drink.

 

I met them a couple of times and asked them politely not to do so. That was my biggest mistake: when someone litters and does not understand that it's no good, they won't understand words. Calling the police is kind of a solution, but I need to make a photo of them smoking and not let them walk away until the police is coming. Gonna still try to do so.

 

Yesterday night I met them and told not to smoke and litter. This morning the staircase was full of cigarette ends. Looks like they did this intentionally to make me angry. They made it, because now I want to hurt them. Unfortunately, no effective legal way exists against them.

 

Also going to yell at them to frighten them. I hope they think I'm a total idiot and better not to mess with me and they'll stop smoking. Going to throw water from a bucket at them.

 

Smiley Mad Smiley Mad Smiley Mad

33 REPLIES 33
colettelewis
Community Member

Aren't there lockdown restrictions in Russia? If there are, then I think you would be justified in calling the police - cigarettes aside. 

Yes, there are restrictions here. If I'm going to threaten them with the police, I will have to call if they ignore my words again (which is likely to happen). And the problem with the police is that the moment they come cannot be predicted. If they see noone, they will just leave. If I call multiple times and they won't encounter anyone, I may get a fine for a fake call. So I will have to stay with those guys and not let them leave for a half an hour or so.

 

Or I can make their photo smoking and then go to the police station and write a complaint. But I don't know where they live and it's kind of complicated to find this out.

 

I came up with another possible solution. I collected all their litter and going to hand it over to them (in a rude manner, that they definitely won't like).


Aleksandr S wrote:

Yes, there are restrictions here. If I'm going to threaten them with the police, I will have to call if they ignore my words again (which is likely to happen). And the problem with the police is that the moment they come cannot be predicted. If they see noone, they will just leave. If I call multiple times and they won't encounter anyone, I may get a fine for a fake call. So I will have to stay with those guys and not let them leave for a half an hour or so.

 

Or I can make their photo smoking and then go to the police station and write a complaint. But I don't know where they live and it's kind of complicated to find this out.

 

I came up with another possible solution. I collected all their litter and going to hand it over to them (in a rude manner, that they definitely won't like).


My friend got sent to Switzerland for work. He said while he was there someone called 911 (whatever it is there) because he saw some drunk guy drowning in the river. Apparently, the drunk guy made it to the other side and survived so the guy who called the paramedics was fined. lol 

prestonhunter
Community Member

You can try a charm offensive.

I tried to talk to them as much as my oratory allowed it. The last time I talked to them I saw a glimpse of a smile on a girl's face: she is young, stupid and thinks I'm a **Edited for Community Guidelines** that tells them what to do. I guess they belong to such kind of people who will only understand when they fought back with force or with fines.

vladag
Community Manager
Community Manager

Hi Aleksandr,

 

I understand where you're coming from. While I'm not aware of a foolproof solution for problems of this nature, I found it's always best to get as less emotionally involved as possible, especially now when stress levels are generally higher than usual. Hope you find a way to resolve the issue.

 

Not sure if you have Stop Ham activists in your area :).

~ Vladimir
Upwork

I was trying to translate Stop Ham until I realized what you were talking about, haha. For non-Russian readers: it's an organization (Stop **Edited for Community Guidelines** ) that mostly fight with drivers who park their cars on sidewalks or other places where it's prohibited to park and when the police simply does nothing. They're not as active as were several years ago. And I guess it was all just for views on Youtube.

 

Thanks for the support. Trying to keep calm.

You can first go to your local Police station and speak to cops. Depending whether it's a big station or not you may have cops assigned to your neighborhood. If you can talk to them they may respond to future calls more promptly.

 

**Edited for Community Guidelines**

 

 

-----------
"Where darkness shines like dazzling light"   â€”William Ashbless


@versailles wrote:

You can first go to your local Police station and speak to cops. Depending whether it's a big station or not you may have cops assigned to your neighborhood. If you can talk to them they may respond to future calls more promptly.

 

**Edited for Community Guidelines**

 

____________________________

Lol! I was going to suggest cutting up a large onion (and really sniffing up the fumes), to make him cry and cough and then going out of his apartment and say he was feeling really ill... 


 

I carry a tear gas can for inadequates and angry dogs. Luckily I have not met them for many years. But I'm prepared! I'm sure this will make my smokers disappear forever... and appear (in an hour, when they can see again and not cry) in the police station complaining about me. Up to 15 days imprisonment is guaranteed.


Aleksandr S wrote:

I carry a tear gas can for inadequates and angry dogs. Luckily I have not met them for many years. But I'm prepared! I'm sure this will make my smokers disappear forever... and appear (in an hour, when they can see again and not cry) in the police station complaining about me. Up to 15 days imprisonment is guaranteed.


Looks like...

 

 

 

 

 

...smoking kills.

a_lipsey
Community Member

So, while I know it's annoying, why don't you buy a trashcan and put it where they smoke and ask them to use it? Tell them the smoke doesn't bother you, and you're happy to provide a trashcan if they wouldn't mind using it?  I know they should just clean up after themselves, but people are animals. But if you put the trashcan there or ashtray there, they will probably use it.  Just a thought...

Yes, I also thought about a trash can. Unfortunately, when it gets filled, noone's going to empty it and cigarette ends will be on the floor again. And since it's officially prohibited to smoke on staircases, it will eventually disappear "as unneeded". Even smaller tin cans will be thrown away.

Here in France you can scare people by yelling with a Russian accent. I'm not sure the oppsite would work...

 

 

 

-----------
"Where darkness shines like dazzling light"   â€”William Ashbless

Haha, after your post I remember a story that happened with one of my colleauges. He worked in a company that sent him to Detroit (as far as I remember). Once he decided to take a bus. When he got off, a group **Edited for Community Guidelines** stopped him and started asking something. He was so afraid, he could not understand a single word, so he began yelling and swearing on Russian. They were so confused, so they let him go. Later he was told that it's better to carry a 20 dollar bill in a pocket for such unexpected meetings.

-----------
"Where darkness shines like dazzling light"   â€”William Ashbless

Lol, should accept this as a solution.

 

There is a Russian actor, Anton Lapenko, who has become very popular recently and he's got 2M youtube subs just in one year. This is his clip. I have no idea what he sings in French about (maybe it's just gibberish), but sometimes he pronounces Russian words in French manner that sound funny

 

 


Aleksandr S wrote:

I have no idea what he sings in French about (maybe it's just gibberish),


It's gibberish, but that guy is totally demented 🙂

 

 

-----------
"Where darkness shines like dazzling light"   â€”William Ashbless


Rene K wrote:

Here in France you can scare people by yelling with a Russian accent. I'm not sure the oppsite would work...

 

 

 


Nobody, Rene, nobody in history was ever scared by a French accent, in the history of ever. 

Get a old coffee can or some type of larger can, fill it with sand and put it out there for them to put their butts in. At the very least you can tell the police that you are trying to get them to act appropriately. The police might see you are trying and be more open to helping you out? Just a thought!

robinae
Community Member

best response yet, makes sense and hopefully one of them will react nicely

lysis10
Community Member

Bro, I escaped apartment life **Edited for Community Guidelines**. I'm never going back.

I'm never going back.

...until your freaking neighbors (that looked nice when you moved in) start listening to the music at nights or talk loudly and cannot be stopped. Until you can't sleep well, because that freaking rooster crows at 4am and at 6am like an alarm, so you have to close windows. Also, some people save money and don't use garbage removal services and simply burn it. Yes, it's illegal, but who cares? Mmm, I like the smell of burned plastic and rubber. And many more funny things.

 

Of course, you won't encounter this often. But I've heard and read enough of such stories, when people planned to "never go back".

 

Planning to live on Mars in future. I hope aliens are nicier there.


Aleksandr S wrote:

I'm never going back.

...until your freaking neighbors (that looked nice when you moved in) start listening to the music at nights or talk loudly and cannot be stopped. Until you can't sleep well, because that freaking rooster crows at 4am and at 6am like an alarm, so you have to close windows. Also, some people save money and don't use garbage removal services and simply burn it. Yes, it's illegal, but who cares? Mmm, I like the smell of burned plastic and rubber. And many more funny things.

 

Of course, you won't encounter this often. But I've heard and read enough of such stories, when people planned to "never go back".

 

Planning to live on Mars in future. I hope aliens are nicier there.


haha so true, friend. I have decided to rent for a while so I can move whenever I feel like it. I plan on moving I think next year again. I live on a corner lot and have only one neighbor right now and I'm friends with them. Their other neighbor is **Edited for Community Guidelines** and they apparently fit the stereotype. My neighbor wants to move because of them.

 

I could tell you some horror stories about my apartment life but suffice to say I know your feels.

I once lived in a place in London where we had a nice terrace out back, but it was easily accessible from the street and we had to chase trespassers out of there all the time. At one point, a scary bunch of "yoofs" who looked like gang members started hanging out there, drinking and leaving beer cans (and syringes!) behind. We didn't want to confront them or call police in case there were repercussions. 

 

After 4-5 nights of us cowering inside wondering what to do, my boyfriend at the time (who was an actor), decided to go out and join them. He put on a bathrobe, white socks and sandals, and a pair of nerdy glasses, grabbed a beer, and casually strolled out. He started asking them all kinds of questions in a kindly, grandfatherly way, about how they liked school and what were their favourite sports. (I was watching from the window, trying very very hard not to laugh out loud.) They couldn't get out of there fast enough. The next night they came back, he did it again, and they quickly left again. And that was the end of that.

 

I highly suggest this approach. Just go out there, join them, chat away and act like a boring weirdo (or get somebody else to do it, since they know you already). It will become a less desirable spot for these people to hang out.

 

Christine -- That is BRILLIANT !!!


Janean L wrote:

Christine -- That is BRILLIANT !!!


I know - I'm sitting here 15 years later, laughing about how my ex had told one leather jacket-wearing thug that he should think about studying computer science, "Cuz I hear that these computer things are really taking off!" 😄

 

How smart!

I remembered a way how to stop somebody's loud and unstoppable chat. Just get into the conversation and start asking question: and what he did? and what she said? oh, that can't be happening! etc. Although I've never tried this, I've heard people usually either stop chatting or leave.

I'm going to start drinking beer too then burping and farting. Should be nasty enough for them to leave. Unfortunately, I don't have enough actor skills to talk in a grandfatherly or similar way.



Aleksandr S wrote:

How smart!

I remembered a way how to stop somebody's loud and unstoppable chat. Just get into the conversation and start asking question: and what he did? and what she said? oh, that can't be happening! etc. Although I've never tried this, I've heard people usually either stop chatting or leave.

I'm going to start drinking beer too then burping and farting. Should be nasty enough for them to leave. Unfortunately, I don't have enough actor skills to talk in a grandfatherly or similar way.


This is reminding me of an approach that was used by 7-11 stores in the city where I grew up to prevent people from congregating and loitering outside: They would set up speakers outside the stores and play LOUD CLASSICAL MUSIC.

chickenupwork
Community Member

Print and stick a "quarantined for public safety" sticker outside our door - it'll keep them all far away.

Do you have "Crisco" there? (A can of pure fat for frying stuff.) 

2 cans of Crisco

A dash of pure spite

 

Broom the cig butts to one side: carefully spread the Crisco where they stand, and run like ***!

 

Seriously, has to be a better way to deal with them. I had a lady with three miserable Corgis who yapped beneath my window at 6am - we won't discuss my solution, but it sure did work (and no Queen mutts were harmed, either!)


Catherine L wrote:

Do you have "Crisco" there? (A can of pure fat for frying stuff.) 

2 cans of Crisco

A dash of pure spite

 

Broom the cig butts to one side: carefully spread the Crisco where they stand, and run like ***!

 

Seriously, has to be a better way to deal with them. I had a lady with three miserable Corgis who yapped beneath my window at 6am - we won't discuss my solution, but it sure did work (and no Queen mutts were harmed, either!)


____________________________

So, you zapped the lady and kept the corgis? 

astepanov83
Community Member

I'm happy to say that the problem is solved (I guess 🙂 )! Told them to get lost and it worked!

Now the staircase is always clean and only random pigs sometimes litter when they pass by. Not a big deal.

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