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Journaling the end

Community Guru
Wendy C Member Since: Aug 24, 2015
111 of 138

Bill, saying I wish we had a magic wand to make everything better seems foolish in the extreme.  But it is true.  You have given so very much to the eL and U community(ies) and even more to many of us. 


I know I speak for every member of a group you were a key part of as you worked so hard to direct us on a path the success. Thank you for so generously sharing your knowledge, support, and good spirits. Thank you.  Forever.


Keep fighting to heal. You are stronger than you think.


Sending love, positive thoughts, and much Aloha.



Community Guru
Mary W Member Since: Nov 10, 2014
112 of 138

Please stay in the community and let us know how you are doing.  Although we've never met you, I venture to say that you have become an important and influential part of this group.  Many prayers coming your way.

Community Guru
Janean L Member Since: Apr 6, 2016
113 of 138

Wishing you and your family all the very best, also, Avery!

Community Guru
Bill H Member Since: Aug 18, 2017
114 of 138

Thanks for all the well-wishes. I've recovered to about 40% of where I was a month ago; my decision to retire is a good one. I can't work long enough to make a diference to most clients.

Ace Contributor
Md E Member Since: Apr 26, 2018
115 of 138

I smiled again Man Happy. I had a dream to be in the military but I failed. Whenever I see a military person I envy. I feel the same now. You are lucky. A very few get the chance to serve the country. Your words inspire me.

You decided to learn the "why". But I know "why" from you. So I must try to be a good freelancer. 

Community Guru
Vesna M Member Since: May 15, 2012
116 of 138

I'm sorry this is happening to you.

Last days I think a lot about the path we are all taking, and I suppose true comfort that I can find is in the moments of kindness and love we exchange in between with people who surround us. It's only what matters, even if we get the chance only to be for a short moment of our lives in this reality.

Don't correct my grammar!
Community Guru
Bill H Member Since: Aug 18, 2017
117 of 138

I've crashed. In and out of Emergency Departments and hospital admissions, digestive system is shot with permanent severe pain. No energy. Crisis last night with pain, collapsed unable to breathe. Don't need oxygen normally, but had to go on 2L/hr to drive out the cytotoxins. My body is nearing the end of ,its design life.


Thanks for the well-wishes and support. There's no prognosis. i've fulfilled my obligations to my clients and have given one UW freelancer a two-hours pay bonus and glowing five-star recommendation. The other one will stay on for now

Community Guru
Mary W Member Since: Nov 10, 2014
118 of 138

Praying for peace for you and for your family.  God bless you and all those who love you and admire you - many of whom you've never met.

Community Guru
Scott B Member Since: Nov 20, 2015
119 of 138

Bill -


As Yogi said, "It ain't over until it's over". 


When it's time for any of us, all we can hope is that we leave having left an overall positive imprint on others and society as a whole. Mission accomplished, Bill. 

Community Guru
Bill H Member Since: Aug 18, 2017
120 of 138

Thank you, Scott. I'm going to hang around for a bit and I just asked my VA what he wanted to do; he'll hang with me for a while. I can no longer trust myself to help clients with life-or-death issues. I sleep about 14 hours/day, and when awake cannot do much of anything. I'm reading a kindle book a day, and today wrote the first words in a manuscript in two months. I have six books I want to finish before I am done; it will be close. I reached the bottom of the rabbit hole and turned around. I've got an appt with the neurosurgeon to increase the outflow rate for the brain shunt, which will let me begin titrating down a medication that is exacerbating GI problems and cognitive decline. Then I can switch anti-depressants and sort out one that works.


The Golden Years are mostly base metal.