This is ridiculous, but I need help responding to the thing!

[jokerette]

I got an invite to do 20k words on fairly sophisticated subjects including refs and so on. Yours truly being fairly broke, lousy money (320) > no money at all - soooo I got back to him with a few samples.

He came back at me today with an, erm, even lousier proposal. Would I mind doing a 500 word test - carefully researched, using refs ad nauseum, for five bucks? Well, yes I'd mind doing a blog for you for five bucks. 

The guy has shelled out $1800 for 120 hires. (!) I have the distinct feeling that other souls out there are falling for this in a big way, all to get to the (still lousy) 320 - which I'm certain never materializes. So. Two questions.

What's a nice way to say homie doesn't do squat for 5 bucks, but WOULD for x bucks?

I worked for Elance for years. THEY dinged you if you turned down a certain number of invites. Same here? (Not that I did, btw lol!)

If you guys can stop laughing enough to shoot me a response, I'd appreciate it!

[mtngigi]

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Catherine L wrote:

I got an invite to do 20k words on fairly sophisticated subjects including refs and so on. Yours truly being fairly broke, lousy money (320) > no money at all - soooo I got back to him with a few samples.

He came back at me today with an, erm, even lousier proposal. Would I mind doing a 500 word test - carefully researched, using refs ad nauseum, for five bucks? Well, yes I'd mind doing a blog for you for five bucks. 

The guy has shelled out $1800 for 120 hires. (!) I have the distinct feeling that other souls out there are falling for this in a big way, all to get to the (still lousy) 320 - which I'm certain never materializes. So. Two questions.

What's a nice way to say homie doesn't do squat for 5 bucks, but WOULD for x bucks?

I worked for Elance for years. THEY dinged you if you turned down a certain number of invites. Same here? (Not that I did, btw lol!)

If you guys can stop laughing enough to shoot me a response, I'd appreciate it!

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A nice way to say it is exactly as you suggested: "homie doesn't do squat for 5 bucks, but WOULD for x bucks?" Of course you'll need to replace "homie" and "squat", and then enter a bid you would be willing to do for 500 words. (cheap clients are nothing to laugh at)

ETA: You might also want to explain that after fees and self-employment taxes, $5 amounts to working for free. I know we're not supposed to discuss those sorts of things with clients, but an opportunity to educate might make this client pause before suggesting $5 for anything.

[lysis10]

you can totally say "homie don't play that." Nothing against the rules there.

I turn down stuff all the time. If they actually hit your JSS for that, I'd be in big trouble. lol

[madison-russell]

Just say something like "I'm sorry, but that is much lower than my base rate for 500 words. I can only do X dollars." If he says no, then just move on and apply for something else. There is a client out there that will pay you a living wage, you just have to find them.

[jokerette]

Y'all rock! That's what I'll say. I have a decent interview coming up - and for a half-second I actually thought wow, two!

NOT lolol

[dsmgdesign]

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Catherine L wrote:

Y'all rock! That's what I'll say. I have a decent interview coming up - and for a half-second I actually thought wow, two!

NOT lolol

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Tell them "sorry, my starting price is $XXX.XX for Y job."  Nothing more that you need to say.