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Holy smokes! I did not expect such a confident write up from someone so young. (You look young to me -- I guarantee I'm a bit older than you.)
Anyway, confidence is perhaps the number one thing you need when you are starting out. And your sense of confidence and your focus and sense of purpose all blew me away. Right from the opening -- that's a great opening you have there.
But first I looked at your portfolio and thought "I hope this guy mentions his range of styles" and, sure enough, you did exactly that. So that's terrific.
Here's what you might do: You might write a sentence or two about your professional experiences. Just say someting like, "I have sold illustrations to _____, _____, and _____."
That tells people that other people took a risk on you and they seem to have been pleased with the results.
Also, if you do have another style or two to show us, do that. I really noticed only two styles ...
If not, you should probably post one or two more illustrations whether they are in the same style or not. And, you don't have to post only items you've sold, so feel free to sit down and work out a new style or two and whip up some new samples -- as long as they meet your standards, which seem pretty high.
Another thing to say is "My illustration are appropriate for storybooks, album covers, CD covers, posters, marketing material, graphic novels ...." and anything else you can think of. Sometimes a customer is looking for a book jacket cover and will pass you buy simply because they didn't see the words "book jacket cover" in your write up. I'm not very technical, but apparently people can do a "keyword" search to find workers and if you don't litter your write up with the right keywords you could be passing up opportunities.
You will do great over time ... expand your mind from a business point of view. Create a business that reflects your ambitions ...
Good luck. I'm impressed.
I like your write up. It covers a lot of ground. It also does the three things all profiles must do: It is friendly; it tells us you are an expert; and it has plenty of confidence.
Frankly, I think you should double your rate, but that's up to you.
Hard working, reliable, passionate. There are 10,000 web developers on Upwork who say they are hardworking, reliable and passionate. You sound exactly like everybody else.
What makes you different? What do you offer they don't offer? What services, skills, personal touch do you have that nobody else has?
Don't take this the wrong way, but why would you define yourself as a good leader given the point that freelancers work for themselves? Who do you expect to lead?
Clients care about the service they are buying. That's what they are spending their money on.
A client doesn't necessarily care what software you use; they probably only care if what you do fits the operating system they have. So instead of saying "I know these software applications," what you should say is "I will make sure to use software that is compatible with your operating system."
The overall point is that the profile should be a sales pitch about your service or services and talk to clients on their level. What are you selling and how will your customers benefit from buying that from you?
Make sure you sound friendly and confident. But focus mostly on the service(s) and how clients will benefit. The rest will fall into place.
Maybe I'm being dense, but what services are you selling? You should spell that out.
One way to think that through is to describe the problem or problems you can solve. Finish this sentence, "I can help you ......."
clients are hiring you to fix a problem or problems. That's what your profile should focus on.