Someone please give me a feedback on this cover letter.

[juliodallacort20]

Hello there. I'm trying to make a living on upwork as a translator. I'm struggling a lot with cover letters and I was just able to win 3 jobs until now. Today I've send this cover letter to a client. Could someone give me a feedback on it? Here it is.

Hello Vittoria. I'm a Brazilian Portuguese translator. I posses many certifications in the English field and I'm also on the Rising Talent program here on Upwork. I'm very interested in translating this project for you, and I think I would be the right translator to do it. I will be able to start immediately and deliver it as soon as possible for you. Feel free to message me. I'm very communicative and will be glad to answer questions. Thank you. Best Regards, Julio **Edited for Community Guidelines** Brazilian Portuguese Translator

[petra_r]

---

@Julio D wrote:

Hello there. I'm trying to make a living on upwork as a translator. I'm struggling a lot with cover letters and I was just able to win 3 jobs until now. Today I've send this cover letter to a client. Could someone give me a feedback on it? Here it is.

Hello Vittoria. I'm a Brazilian Portuguese translator. I posses many certifications in the English field and I'm also on the Rising Talent program here on Upwork. I'm very interested in translating this project for you, and I think I would be the right translator to do it. I will be able to start immediately and deliver it as soon as possible for you. Feel free to message me. I'm very communicative and will be glad to answer questions. Thank you. Best Regards, Julio **Edited for Community Guidelines** Brazilian Portuguese Translator

---

 The client likely gets 95% of exactly that sort of thing, including the awkward phrasing....

It's wishy-washy and what isn't wishy-washy is stating the obvious. It's all about you, not about the client or their project.

• Hello Vittoria. 
  
• I'm a Brazilian Portuguese translator. Obviously, why else would you be applying for a Brazilian Portugese translation gig?
  
• I posses many certifications in the English field  I'd leave that out. Your English isn't that strong and you may want to not draw attention to that fact. If you must mention them, be specific.
  
• and I'm also on the Rising Talent program here on Upwork. Client can see that, it means nothing
  
• I'm very interested in translating this project for you, Well, obviously, or else you wouldn't have applied...
  
• and I think I would be the right translator to do it. WHY? What do you have that the other 100 applicants do not? What is your unique selling point?
  
• I will be able to start immediately and
• deliver it as soon as possible for you. WHEN? "As soon as possible" is meaningless.
  
• Feel free to message me.   Obvious
• I'm very communicative and will be glad to answer questions.Obvious
• Thank you. Best Regards, Julio Dallacort Brazilian Portuguese Translator    Superfluous
  

[versailles]

Julio, never send out a 100% templated proposal. You have no idea how bad this looks. Clients receive 90% of copy/pasted proposals.

Personalize each of them and do your best to tailor them to the job you're applying to.

[luce-neidert]

Hi Julio,

It's not easy to get jobs on Upwork, so there's nothing unusual about finding it hard to find your first few jobs. Trying to better your cover letter is a good idea. Petra's comments are very useful.

Have you studied translation or are you just trying to get jobs as a translator? If you have studied translation, don't forget to say so, or to mention your profile where you should have entered all that information.

Otherwise, have you passed the tests that can prove a client that you have some competence in the necessary fields? If you haven't you should do so. Should the results not be that great, you don't have to make them public.

[prestonhunter]

Julio, this "cover letter" is all about you!

That is totally not how to get hired.

As a client, I am not interested in you.

I am interested in me and my project.

Your cover letter should be about three things:

- me

- my project

- how you are going to help ME with MY project

[angelawriter53]

Here is a revised version.  It's more dynamic and inviting, I think. Check out the punctuation and language:

Hello Ms. Vittoria,

I'm a Brazilian Portuguese translator with many English certifications.  I am also in the Rising Talent program here on Upwork. I'm very interested in translating this project for you.  I am very experienced, very educated, and fluent in Portuguese and English. I can start immediately and deliver the project quickly. 

You are my #1 priority. We can have a long, successful, professional relationship. Please message me so I may answer your questions. Thank you.

Best Regards,

Julio **Edited for Community Guidelines**,

Brazilian Portuguese Translator

[luce-neidert]

I don't know, but I would receive an offer stating "You are my #1 priority", I would just laugh and take if for a joke. 

[petra_r]

---

@Angela S wrote:

Here is a revised version.

---

 It's as bad, except for the slightly improved English. It's till all about him, still largely irrelevant waffle, nobody says "Ms Vittoria..."

I also don't think it is advisable to encourage a freelancer to outright lie in their cover letter.

The "You are my #1 priority. " bit makes me cringe, as does "We can have a long, successful, professional relationship."

[iacob_irina]

Why don't you say something among these lines?

"Hello!

My name is Julio and I translate English to Brazilian Portuguese and vice-versa for [insert number of years]. On top of my experience, I also have [insert the name of the diploma] from [insert name of the institution where you got it from].

I strive to deliver the work [or task] on time, and I'm always available for communication.

Thank you for considering me,

Best regards, Julio"

Make sure not to copy everything [though you're better off not copying the text], and to edit out the stuff in brakets. Let us know how it goes.

[iacob_irina]

I forgot to say this:

Do mention in your cover letter if there are subjectsor fields you're better at. For instance you could say somethinf like this: My strong points are legal and medical translations, while literature is my weakest.

This mention should go right after you're saying for how long you're a translator.

If you're affiliated with some offline translation company, you could also mention that in your experience, such as "i also worked with XYZ translation company for 2.5 years."

This is how you show your possible client why you're better than 100 other candidates.

good luck!

[luce-neidert]

Same the same thing was posted twice by mistake.

[luce-neidert]

Irina, in my opinion this is not a very good cover letter. Here's why:

1/ If you are answering a job offer, you must say in what you are a good fit for the job offered. Don't just repeat the information given by your profile unless it's absolutely necessary.

2/ A real translator, who has studied translation, knows that he's only supposed to be at his/her best when translating into his/her native tongue. 

3/ Please follow the rules. You must capitalize English  in "english to Brazilian Portuguese". If Julio would just copy your "template", he would show right away that he doesn't know much about written English - or doesn't pay attention to detail - that would'nt leave a very good impression.

[iacob_irina]

Luce, Thank you for your input. There were more typos in there, than just the word "english".. so I went ahead and fixed them. 

I do hope Julio won't copy what I wrote, but we all know some people simply don't know how to compose a cover letter that would convince anyone to give them the job - so it's easier for them to copy one. 

I also didn't check his profile to see what info he presents. I also don't know how clients operate: do they read cover letter first, or do they check profiles first? I assume they read cover letters before checking profiles of those who they're interested in interviewing. 

For instance, i'm a freelance writer for 8 years now, but im on the site for just 6 or so? i honestly forgot. I believe many other freelancers are in a similar boat. If a client isn't informed in the cover letter that the candidate has the experience needed for the job, the profile won't even be looked at. 

For the 2nd point, I'm not a translator ... however I see where you're coming from. And this is why Julio should not just copy my 'template' 😉

[luce-neidert]

Well done, Irina - don't forget that you can always use the spell checker before submitting!

I remember reading that what clients get first is an e-mail with the first sentence of your cover letter, that's why if they're looking for a native French translator, I start with "Hi (or Good morning/afternoon), I'm a native French speaker, experienced in translating from English to French ....".

When they want to know more about your training or your experience, clients usually say so either in the job offer or in their questions, that's why I don't bother to repeat the information given by my profile. Don't forget that they usually receive many answers to their offer, and they probably usually start by weeding out whatever cover letter they feel is too long, too detailed - or that's what I would do. That's why I try keep to my cover letters short and to the point. The result isn't too bad, so I guess I must be doing the right thing.

[iacob_irina]

For some reason my browser' spell checker doesn't work when I try to reply. I'd have to use some other text editor. 

Yes, short and to the point cover letters are best and I saw them being recommended by many human resources specialists. And I also found a formula that works well enough for me. If I were a client I would also weed out those cover letters you mentioned. 

Julio however really needed a starting point, so I thought my "template" would be just that, a starting point, until he finds his own formula. 😉 

[luce-neidert]

Technical problems.... 

Anyway, that was nice of you to try to help Julio since he seems to have disappeared. I wonder if he's reading our advice....

But it's good advice (to my mind), so someone else might be interested in using it.