🐈
» Groups » Writers & Translators » Forum » Tips for my overview
Page options
jerryjames91
Community Member

Tips for my overview

Hey all! 

 

I was hoping to get some feedback on my profile overview. I fear I might be coming off as....snobbish or obnoxious. Should I tone down the 'selly-ness' of the text? 

 

All suggestions are welcome 🙂 

 

PS. Profile link for those who don't want to navigate through my forum profile - https://www.upwork.com/fl/jjames

12 REPLIES 12
fakharuddin35
Community Member

no you should not

 

colettelewis
Community Member


@Jerry J wrote:

Hey all! 

 

I was hoping to get some feedback on my profile overview. I fear I might be coming off as....snobbish or obnoxious. Should I tone down the 'selly-ness' of the text? 

 

All suggestions are welcome 🙂 

 

PS. Profile link for those who don't want to navigate through my forum profile - **Edited for Community Guidelines**


Why can't Jerry leave his Upwork profile link? Other freelancers do.  It is impossible to find him otherwise. I've just done a search. Jerry J doesn't exist. There are hundreds of other Jerrys all interspersed with people whose names don't even begin with J.

 

The freelancer search is a joke - actually not a joke - it is extremely frustrating.

Sorry about the confusion. As long as it's not used for advertisement of services, freelancers can include their own profile link in their Community post.

~ Valeria
Upwork

Thanks Valeria,

 

But can we see the link? I actually cannot find Jerry in the freelancer searches.

 

Oops sorry, I've just seen it in his post. Thanks!

Yeah, the freelancer search sometimes does show results that are nowhere close to the search query 😛 I've started using Google instead. Of course, that doesn't work for freelancers who have hidden themselves from external search engines. 

researchediting
Community Member

Jerry,

 

Your overview is much too long, and it starts with generalities. Clients aren't looking for a survey of the field, or why others offer services that aren't up to your standards. They want to know what you can do for them. Now. Before they click on to another candidate who does that.

For many years I avoided having a profile long enough to require clicking the "more" button. I finally succumbed to having a "jump." I still think it is a useful discipline to see whether you can work in enough compelling information "above the fold" to prompt the prospect to action.

Your thoughts about the state and foibles of the industry might work better as a portfolio piece.

On a technical note, quotes extending past a paragraph are signaled thus:

"Paragraph 1

"Paragraph 2

"Paragraph 3"

Such a quote in your profile now blindsides us to discover that you have not switched back to your own voice, as the lack of an introductory quote mark on the second paragraph would indicate.

 

Best,

Michael

Appreciate the input Douglas! I agree with your observations about the quotes. I can see how that may be confusing to the reader. Fixed and learnt something new! Thanks. 

 

As for the overview being long -- I figured that the clients sending me an invite would've done one of two things: 

  1. Read through the whole thing and understood what I offer, in addition to liking my way of convincing them. 
  2. Wouldn't have bothered to read anything at all and sent me an invite anyway. 

In your opinion, why is a shorter piece better? Is it because it shows clients that I am capable of inciting action using succinct content pieces? Or is it because clients just want to get to the end faster? 

 

My honest opinion is:

I stopped reading after 2 sentences. If I am a client, I want to find a freelancer, not a story.

I might get the impression, that if I hire you, you will start telling me the next story instead of working, so to speak.

 

Your profile should be on point.

Fair enough. I was trying to make sure that my overview doesn't become about me. But in attempting to convey what I could do for my clients, I guess I got carried away and stretched it a little too much. 

 

That makes two people who think it's too long 🤔I'll rework and test it out. Appreciate the input! 


@Jerry J wrote:

That makes two people who think it's too long 🤔


 Make that three 😉

Noted 😛 Smiley LOL

 

Overview v4.0 incoming


@Jerry J wrote:

....why is a shorter piece better? Is it because it shows clients that I am capable of inciting action using succinct content pieces? Or is it because clients just want to get to the end faster? 

 


 Yes.