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proposal help

Ace Contributor
Jake R Member Since: Jul 28, 2016
1 of 15

I wanted to ask another question to the community. Is there any way that some of you guys would mind commenting on a few proposal samples. I feel that I have pretty good ones, but I am not getting the jobs that I should and I feel that might be holding me back!

 

I have a few samples, and these are in the writing category. 

 

And to answer your question, no I do not just copy and paste these into any jobs i search for.

 

Dear (first name)!

 

I really feel like I am the person for the job, but not just based off my abilities, I am basing that off what my clients think:

 

"Great experience. Delivered ahead of schedule, very thoughtful, and would not hesitate to work with again!" -Laura Pennington.

 

"I enjoy working with Jake, we have become close over the past few projects. He takes pride in what he does and is very precise. great personality and his willingness to give you what you need feels nice." -Casey Shipp.

 

This job is right along the lines of what I do. I am no stranger to editing and proofreading, as most of my past jobs have been in that field. I have also been editing and proofreading throughout my undergrad and graduate degrees, so I am no stranger to thoroughly scanning work for errors.  I have actually done a few projects like this in the past if you care to read them (link), (link)

 

I want you to also know that I always strive for a perfect rating on my work as you can see on my profile. I want to make sure that you are completely happy with my work, so while working on your project, I will be in touch with you, possibly sending a draft or two, making sure you are happy with my completed work up until that point.  

As stated before, I am really looking forward to hearing from you.

 

When is a good time to get you on a Skype call? **Edited for Community Guidelines**

 

________

 

or this one

 

Hello !

 

It would be an honor for me to be selected for your job posting.

I have done many jobs of this nature which you will find here (this will be a link to drop box pdf) and here (same), to get a feel for my style of writing.

 

This project speaks to me because of a few things I read in your job description. You mentioned (go into the proposal, pick things off of it and address here). My level of excitement to potentially be selected for this job just went to a new level to be honest with you!

 

I also wanted to let you know that I carry my work with pride and never feel like the job is done until my clients are completely and 100 percent satisfied.

Let me know when we can hop on a 5 min Skype call so we can talk about this further.

 

----------

 

Maybe i should give video a try?

 

Community Guru
John K Member Since: Feb 17, 2015
2 of 15

Jake, I'm not in the writing category so I may not be the best judge of your proposal examples, but the first one seems *way* too long-winded to me, and if I were a client, I wouldn't bother reading the 2 testimonials.

 

Even the second proposal could be shortened. For instance, you could omit "to be honest with you!" from 

"My level of excitement to potentially be selected for this job just went to a new level to be honest with you!" and exclamations aren't too professional. Similarly, "completely and 100 percent satisfied" is redundant.

 

Lastly, it's your call if you want to skype with clients, but many people, myself included, don't skype people we don't know anything about, so "Let me know when we can hop on a 5 min Skype call so we can talk about this further" could drive away clients who don't want to bother with skype.

__________________________________________________
"No good deed goes unpunished." -- Clare Boothe Luce
Ace Contributor
Jake R Member Since: Jul 28, 2016
3 of 15
Thanks so much for your response John. How do you or would you go about closing a client?
Community Guru
John K Member Since: Feb 17, 2015
4 of 15

Jake, you're welcome. If by 'closing a client' you mean making a proposal, I get to the point as quickly as possible while being polite. I also ask for clarifications where needed and if possible I estimate how quickly I can do the work. I'm a developer so if possible I will provide an overview of how I would approach the task by breaking it down into subtasks -- for a writer, perhaps it could be deliverables like outline, rough draft, final draft, but this is not my area of expertise.

__________________________________________________
"No good deed goes unpunished." -- Clare Boothe Luce
Community Guru
Rene K Member Since: Jul 10, 2014
5 of 15

Jake, writers have a proportion to write long proposal, too long proposals. I know, been there, done that. My current proposals are half shorter than they were at the beginning.

 

Cut the clients testimonials in the proposal, you have them on your profile overview and it turns out that the profile overview is displayed just below the proposal when a client sees it.

 

I love the second one. Straight to the point, speaks to the client about their needs and not about you.

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"Where darkness shines like dazzling light"   —William Ashbless
Ace Contributor
Jake R Member Since: Jul 28, 2016
6 of 15

@Rene K wrote:

Jake, writers have a proportion to write long proposal, too long proposals. I know, been there, done that. My current proposals are half shorter than they were at the beginning.

 

Cut the clients testimonials in the proposal, you have them on your profile overview and it turns out that the profile overview is displayed just below the proposal when a client sees it.

 

I love the second one. Straight to the point, speaks to the client about their needs and not about you.


 Thanks Rene! I really appreciate your feedback today you have been a great help.

Community Guru
Jennifer M Member Since: May 17, 2015
7 of 15

lol guarantees man I dunno I avoid them like the plague. My thing is that people are buying a service and there are no refunds on service. I can't guarantee people will like my stuff. They might hate it and that's ok. Pay me and I'll be on my way.

 

I also tell them 1 revision and that's it. I learned that the hard way after my arbitration. I won but the arbiter did give me crap for saying I don't do endless revisions but never specifying it.

Ace Contributor
Jake R Member Since: Jul 28, 2016
8 of 15

@Jennifer M wrote:

lol guarantees man I dunno I avoid them like the plague. My thing is that people are buying a service and there are no refunds on service. I can't guarantee people will like my stuff. They might hate it and that's ok. Pay me and I'll be on my way.

 

I also tell them 1 revision and that's it. I learned that the hard way after my arbitration. I won but the arbiter did give me crap for saying I don't do endless revisions but never specifying it.


 Jenn again! Thank you so much for your feedback again. That sounds like what I will do. Do not want to over extend myself. 

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9 of 15
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Woman Embarassed

Community Guru
Jennifer M Member Since: May 17, 2015
10 of 15

Is it really an honor to do work for someone? I dunno.. maybe this is a cultural thing. I think they are lucky to have me heehee

 

I always say I bid in a way that I would want to hear, and I don't want any of the rainbows up my butt and like straight shooters personally.

 

Different things work for different people I guess.

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