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pandoraharper
Member

Crazy Job Postings

Folks, feel free to share crazy job postings you see. I've been wanting to create a thread like this for a while, and think it would be fun of we can keep it updated periodically.

 

Warning: Do not copy paste a job description, do not include a link to the post, or client details. Keep it within forum post guidlines!

 

Not sure what those guidelines are? Go here: https://community.upwork.com/t5/Announcements/Upwork-Community-Guidelines/td-p/3/jump-to/first-unrea...

 

Here's something I saw tonight:

 

US client, average pay under $6 per hour, no hourly hires so far, decent feedback, looking for 1 person to do:

 

Article Copywriting, Editing and Proofreading

Customer Service (Phone and Email)

Business Growth & Development

Blog Posting

Stand Operating Procedures Creation and Documentation

Online Research

Social Media Management

Event planning and scheduling

 

And finally: "Knowlege of WordPress Development, Facebook Ads, InfusionSoft, Bookkeeping, etc. a PLUS "

 

No mention in this posting if some of these items would be handled by other members of the team.

 

One word: Sheesh!

 

 

 

ACCEPTED SOLUTION
andregutierrez22
Moderator
Moderator

Hi all,

 

We are closing this thread due to its size. Feel free to visit this new thread if you'd like to continue sharing your experience with odd and curious jobs.

 

We encourage you to have fun and discuss your experience. That said, please be mindful of our Community Guidelines and refrain from posting links to job postings, names of persons or companies, or any other identifying information. Additionally, if you come across a job that violates Upwork TOS, please flag it as inappropriate following the steps outlined here.

 

~Andrea
Upwork

View solution in original post

2,171 REPLIES 2,171

LOL John

 

Eso.... ๐Ÿ˜‰

need to make the program affordable wifi connection which will take place through the registration on my website : guest comes to my office connected to wifi, necessarily has to register on my website and only after that to enjoy free internet If you have questions[...]

 

 

 

Yes, what on Earth are you on about?


@Ramon B wrote:

need to make the program affordable wifi connection which will take place through the registration on my website : guest comes to my office connected to wifi, necessarily has to register on my website and only after that to enjoy free internet If you have questions[...]

 

 

 

Yes, what on Earth are you on about?


Sounds like all this guy is looking for is someone to create a password for others to access his public wifi. LOL

 

Bid $50.  

nullagarrido
Member

Job post title:

 

OIL

 

Job description:

 

Contact me

 

 

End of job post

 

 

Sure..sure...

 

 

A slippery character no doubt. ..

Nothing wrong with that job posting. If I was OIL, I would contact the client.

lol Preston!

 

We must find a freelancer named Oil then and let him/her/it know then!

 

๐Ÿ˜‰

Natalia: I am not a betting man , but on this occasion , I can bet you 20 connects that some contractors applied for the Job posting (on oil) am I right ?

suznee
Member

Sno Cone Maker and Cashier ...

 

I would like to know how someone can be a sno cone maker online ๐Ÿ˜›

I frequently come across jobs that require someone to be on-site either full or part time. While oDesk is primarily a virtual job board, as far as I know, listing on-site jobs is not against the TOS.

 

Having said this, as Suzanne mentions above, what the heck is up with hiring a sno cone machine user and cashier online. Sheesh, just put a "hiring" sign in the front window of your store. I've gotten any number of retail jobs through simply walking into a shopping center or down a main street.

 

I could be wrong about the TOS, and if so, somebody beat me with a wet noodle! Heh.

 

 

I think Pandora's right. I think it's totally fine to post location-specific jobs.

It's not really playing to oDesk's strength, but if clients like using oDesk and want to hire through oDesk, but want to do so locally, more power to them. As long as this is clear in the job description, I think it's fine.

 

The more happy clients there are on oDesk, but better the platform is for contractors.


@Preston H wrote:

I think Pandora's right. I think it's totally fine to post location-specific jobs.

It's not really playing to oDesk's strength, but if clients like using oDesk and want to hire through oDesk, but want to do so locally, more power to them. As long as this is clear in the job description, I think it's fine.

 

The more happy clients there are on oDesk, but better the platform is for contractors.


I'm all for happy clients, but after some consideration of this matter, I'm not so sure how this CAN be legal. After all, if you hire someone to come on-site to your physical location, are they still going to pay the worker through oDesk? Has anyone had experience working on-site with a client who had to report payments to the "corporate office" through their own propertiary systems? I don't really see how this would work.

 

In my retail experiance, for example, everything was managed through their own systems, and they would not have been able to hire an "independent contractor" even if they wanted to.

First of all, it is completely legal. Contractors work on site all over the country every day.

Second, if this was illegal, the problem would be with the law, not oDesk. We should all work to eliminate legal restrictions to success, prosperity, and human rights, not support MORE legal restrictions to these things. Technology, including oDesk, can be one of the great tools for reducing the tyranny of a bloated, anti-freedom legal system.
suznee
Member

The job was so uninformative though. The description was just Cashier and Sno Cone Maker lol.. no location, no we are looking for someone to work our store blah blah blah..

 

That is why I thought it was weird. BTW it had 0 applicants

re: "BTW it had 0 applicants"

 

The job posting for a sno cone operator had 0 applicants?

 

This is an encouraging sign. As there was no location specified, this was a very stupid job posting.

 

But previously, this job posting would have had dozens of applicants, from the spam job appliers who apply randomly to every job.

 

If this job posting had zero applicants, I take it as a sign that oDesk's efforts to cut down on spam job applications via the Connects system have been helping.

 

If serious clients receive fewer spam job applications and receive a higher proportion of quality applications appropriate to their job, then this will be good for me, personally, as a contractor. Because it will mean that more high-quality clients will be on oDesk, and more high-quality jobs will be available to me.

Preston,

 

I agree it is a good sign. Checked the job posting again today and it still has 0 applicants. It is interesting because you are right at one time it would have had dozens of spam applicants, and 4 days into the posting it still has 0 applicants.

re: "a good sign"

 

True story: A few months ago I was doing a job for job postings using the key word "Japanese," so that my wife could see what types of Japanese translation jobs were available at the time. (She is not an oDesk contractor, but she is thinking about starting an account and doing some translation work, something she has done professionally, but not via oDesk.)

 

I saw a number of jobs which required translating English to Japanese and which were clearly specified as intended for Japnese natives only. But the majority of the applicants' names were clearly Indian or Bangladeshi, and when one clicked on the profiles of the applicants, their profile descriptions identified them as web designers or data entry professionals, with no mention of translation as a skill and no mention of Japanese as a language that they speak. They were clearly spam applications posted by "contractors" who were not even reading job postings.

That phenomena makes me think those applicants were using some sort of bidding bot. Even if an oblivious client were to hire an Indian web designer to translate into Japanese, what was that contractor going to do next? The typical spam applications I used to see were logo designers applying for video editing jobs. They probably had a pirated copy of some video editing s/w and thought they could pull off the job, but Japanese translation?

i work this job to have a good advise to me and it is helpful to me for having this is a salary for me

 

 

Another plea for work masquerading as a job. Category: Editing and Proofreading!

re: "Another plea for work masquerading as a job."

 

Whenever I see these I immediately flag them as inappropriate. In my experience, oDesk has done a good job removing these when I flag them.

I really, really, REALLY want to post the link to a job posting I just saw, but know it will be gone by tomorrow morning.

 

Just do a search that includes the terms "creative", "thinkers", "wanted", "to," "learn," together" (get my gist?)....Incredibly convoluted, confusing, and really, really, really not sure what the person is looking for...

 

re: do a search that includes the terms "creative", "thinkers", "wanted", "to," "learn," together"

 

Hmmm... I couldn't find the job when (out of curiosity) I looked for it. Maybe it has been taken down or set on hold now.

 

Certainly sounds unusual. But my basic philosophy is this:

If a client wants to try something unusual or "out of the box," that's fine, as long as the client is paying the contractors, regardless of whether the idea works or is fruitful.

 

If the client is being "creative" or unusual in a way that means they aren't paying the contractor money through oDesk, then the job has no place on oDesk.

vorion
Member

Hello, Everyone

Today, I found this Job post. Smiley Tongue

 

Here is the job post of a guy who wants an assistant... Smiley Very Happy

 _____________________________________________

**edited for Community Guidelines**

 

Beware of these guys, all ladies.. you might be chatting with an assistant.. Smiley Tongue

 

Smiley Tongue   Smiley Tongue     Smiley Tongue

re: "a guy who wants an assistant"

 

I think that's an awesome job posting.

 

Here's the thing, though...


For a guy like this, I imagine that a lot of the girls he would be interested in dating would (if they were being honest) tell him:

 

"You had me at 'I have enough money that I have an assistant to manage my dating site profiles for me.'"

 

Who says romance is dead?

Preston,

 

He has spent over 3000$ on these assistances. He has paid even 12-16$ per hour for few female assistants. Maybe he is trying to figure out his potential dates using feminine assistants.

 

Romance is not just dead, Brutally murdered in Cold blood...

Smiley Frustrated

 

Where do these guys get such ideas? Any idea, Preston? Smiley Tongue

 

I think the guy took the Social Media Marketing to a whole new level.Smiley Very Happy

 

Update: Sadly, Valeria edited the post. I thought posting links, exposing the clients were considered as Violation of Community guidelines.. What did I do??!!!Smiley Frustrated

 

 

 


@Pravin K wrote:

Preston,

 

He has spent over 3000$ on these assistances. He has paid even 12-16$ per hour for few female assistants. Maybe he is trying to figure out his potential dates using feminine assistants.

 

Romance is not just dead, Brutally murdered in Cold blood...

Smiley Frustrated

 

Where do these guys get such ideas? Any idea, Preston? Smiley Tongue

 

I think the guy took the Social Media Marketing to a whole new level.Smiley Very Happy

 

Update: Sadly, Valeria edited the post. I thought posting links, exposing the clients were considered as Violation of Community guidelines.. What did I do??!!!Smiley Frustrated

 

 

 



I'm going to guess that your initial post included a link to the job in question.  This is a Forum Community Violation. I love that this thread is still active. And appreciate you posting. Having said this....

 

Let me take this opportunity (yet again) to remind everyone that posting: 

  • A Job Post Link
  • Direct Copy Of the Job Post text
  • Job Post link to Client Profile

 

These are all Forum Community Violations and will result in your post being edited or deleted.

 

Don't let that stop you, however, from posting crazy and weird jobs that catch your eye. If your not sure how to post legally in this thread, look at other posts that have already been submitte in the thread.

 

mlceron
Member

Once (I think in February or so) I received an invitation to a job posting, from a guy that was looking for a "latina" as a partner, since he lives in San Francisco and apparently there are not enough "latinas" over there. Smiley Frustrated

 

He was offering usd 500 to the person that finds him a woman willing to move to San Francisco... uhmm Red flags all over the place!

 

When I looked at his profile, it was very professional with tons of good reviews (related to professional business) and seemed legit. But how do I know this guy is not a serial killer, really, how oDesk allows this type of jobs here? I bet he found many freelancers willing to do it...

 

I turned it down of course! But I was a newbie and I didn't know anything about flagging, now I know better... Smiley Indifferent

 

 

 

 

suznee
Member

I came across one yesterday, looked like he has spent a lot of money and hired quite a few contractors, Job posting stated if you bid over $1.00 your application will be rejected. If you are hired or before hired, try to contact me on skype, email, or any other way but on oDesk (I assume he posted this before the change) you will be fired and reported.

 

WOW!! I want to work for him... oh joy! Not!

re: "Job posting stated if you bid over $1.00 your application will be rejected."

But just to be clear... I COULD earn an entire dollar if I worked for this fine gentleman?

Well, $.9091 actually....

pandoraharper
Member

As the orginal OP of this thread, I'd like to remind everyone that Job Post links are not allowed in forum posts. Thank you for your attention. ๐Ÿ™‚

 

Also, RE:  the most recent posts regarding scammy clients looking for women.  One word. Ewww!

 

If and when this ever happens to me, I will flag the client, report him, and then hack him.

 

Uh, actually no, I won't hack. I'll hire a hacker. Uh no, I won't actually do that either. But I will want to! These users don't deserve to have an Upwork account. Pure and simple.

 

 

Pandora, if I recall correctly, there was nothing at all scammy about one of the recently discussed clients looking for women.

You may disagree with how he uses assistants to help him with his social media tasks, but he paid $3000 to virtual assistants for this work. And he was honest about what he is hiring people to do.

Is he dishonest with the women he flirts with online? Maybe. It's a bit unusual. But that's different from being a scammy client.

ANOTHER client recently discussed was looking for women among the people he hires, and he IS both scammy and predatory, and you are right to want him gone from Upwork.


@Preston H wrote:
Pandora, if I recall correctly, there was nothing at all scammy about one of the recently discussed clients looking for women.

You may disagree with how he uses assistants to help him with his social media tasks, but he paid $3000 to virtual assistants for this work. And he was honest about what he is hiring people to do.

Is he dishonest with the women he flirts with online? Maybe. It's a bit unusual. But that's different from being a scammy client.

ANOTHER client recently discussed was looking for women among the people he hires, and he IS both scammy and predatory, and you are right to want him gone from Upwork.

Preston, I was of course refering to the "scammy and predatory" type clients. While I do wonder a little bit about job posts that ask for female applicants only, most of them are not looking for anything scammy. At least up front.

 

Like you, I'm very serious about providing professional services to my clients. Am I wrong in wanting the same in return from them?  No, but everyone is different, and the line should be drawn somewhere.

 

It's sad seeing all the reports in the forums about newbie freelancers who get stuck dealing with these clowns. We really need that "Scam" flag option, as well as maybe something else that relates to the scammy client that just wanst to video chat newbie female freelancers.

 

 

I've been meaning to ask this to someone. Why no transparency? When clients know our name to the complete biodata without talking a word to us, what harm will a real copy paste or screenshot of the corrupt clients do? Mostly it will help freelancers identify corrupt clients. So, why is upwork guarding the secrecy of this? Why is the community forum alive if the forum is all about back biting about x, y and z. How is it helping anybody? Yes, we're having a coffee break. 

But, seriously, come to think of it, Upwork is very shady about the clients, why? 

Pandora, will you clear the doubt before they kick me outta this community? 
PS: Today has been a horrendous day with a client rating me 2.85, with no background to the scoring. Pardon my anguish, I have never been rated so bad. And I am sure that it is going to kill my success score. Well, I hope you answer this soon. 

Good Day!

Geo Maria George

Rightly said. There is no transparency in the system. The main idea behind Upwork these days is that freelancers like us NEED to earn money here. I don't believe that. Most of us are here because we don't like the customary 9-5 job, have a passion for what we do, and want to work for ourselves. Upwork is no longer a platform having a healthy blend of freelancers providing their services, and clients getting them (as was Elance, God I miss Elance). Upwork is just about the clients now, be it any aspect. Like charging 10% from freelancers fees? Why not split it 5-5? After all, clients also are here because they want a benefit. Or the negative feedback or the transparency. It is always the freelancers who take a hit.
Just yesterday, i saw a job posting from a client (Payment method unverified of course) asking people for writing services.
Number of proposals- 10 to 15. Interviews- 14. 
I knew it was a scam, nevertheless, i applied (submitted a job proposal containing only hello ๐Ÿ˜„ ) Surprisingly, got a message from the client few minutes later. No hello, No hi. Directly, write an article on this topic, submit it my 24 hours. I didn't even care to reply and flagged the job posting. Sadly, today I logged in and see the number of interviews is 22 and the job is still active, people are still applying and worst,many newbies might be getting duped. 
These are the double standards i despise. I flagged the job, Upwork doesn't care.
But a bad review from a client( I haven't received any, still my JS 72%) and Upwork will make your life hell. 

Dear Geo Maria

 

We all sit in the same boat for as long as we choose to.

I had an UW-client just a short while ago through a friend of mine. I delivered and he gave me a baaad evaluation. My friend talked to him on my behalf, so to my surprise, his only defense was that he had a bad day and let it out on me. He apologized to me through the UW messenger.

I switched him free for an evaluation upgrade and he set it to 5.0. Damage was seemingly done already, my JSS dropped 5% (I had no other job on the platform in those 2 weeks).

I am just happy that I chose to work mostly off the platform and am not directly financially impacted by the way everything is handled on the platform!

Wish u lots of luck though on here.

 

Regards

Thomas

pandoraharper
Member

I was checking out my job feeds this afternoon, and came across this. I really wish I could just link to it. I think this sort of job has been discussed elsewhere in the forums, but with 5 current applicants, I have to wonder.

 

Category: Civil and Structural Engineering

Client Status: New, Unverified

Fixed Price, $30,000

Hiring: 99 Freelancers

 

Job Description: severaly lacking in details, but it does mention "free facilities".

 

I seriously doubt this is a real job.

 

Pandora, the job you describe is clearly not a real job, but is simply somebody messing around with the Upwork client-side interface,
Using a fake account.


@Preston H wrote:
Pandora, the job you describe is clearly not a real job, but is simply somebody messing around with the Upwork client-side interface,
Using a fake account.

Thanks for that clarification, Preston. What I find really odd is that I have actually seen with my own eyes something extremenly similiar more then once, though not for a couple of years.

 

Odd because why would however many random, fake account users would post something so similiar each time. Almost like it's a template that is available to all (though I do not belive that is true).

Pandora,

I don't know what's behind the job posting. I'm just guessing.

 

But I can't imagine anybody is really trying to hire "99 civil/structural engineers" (!) on Upwork, and offering free facilities, unless they're a fictional global criminal organization from a James Bond film.

 

A new, payment-UN-verified client offering 99 contractors fixed-price jobs at $30,000 each? Doesn't make any sense at all.

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